Saturday, June 24, 2006
One Midnight Gone!
Not really, but in keeping with the Sondheim theme ya know...
My first week of telemarketer trainning is over. This job is much more difficult than I ever would have believed. It's daunting, how much you have to remeber and how quickly you must remember it. and, after this week, if you screw up, you lose "quality points." Who gives a shit really, except they determine whether or not you get a bonus. Most of the calls are pretty starightforward and easy. Hangups, answering machines etc., but if you actually get to talk to someone, it gets a little complicated. If they hang up BEFORE a certain point in the script, it's a hang up or a call back. If they don't, it's an adamant no. Basically if they know why you're calling it's adamant no, but things have to be done so fast. We also lose points if we take too long at the end of a call. You only have split seond to look at the names before you have to say them. Every single thing you say is r4ecorded. It's all very confusing. I'll never be rude a telemarketer again, I tell ya.

I'll pass along some secrets so you, too can be nice to these poor folks who just have to work for a living.

If you get a call and you don't want to be bothered again, tell them to put you on the do not call list. Even if you are on the national DNC, it doesn't apply to non-profit orgs, which is who we've been calling for. They are, ideally supposed to verify your information for the DNC, and please be patient if they ask this...if anything is wrong your name won't be entered correctly and you'll get more calls.

If they ask you to spell your first name, it's not because they don't have it. It's because they are not allowed to ask for it or let you know they have it. it's a privacy law thing.
They get your number because it's listed in the phone book. thats all. there is not giant name selling conspiracy (that conspiracy is covered by the national DNC) if you really don't want these kind of calls, you have to get an unlisted number. The DNC I have is only for the organization I'm calling for, and there are THOUSANDS.

If they ask you once and you say no and don't hang up, they are, except in arkansas and tennessee, required by their job to ask again. If we don't ask again we get an automatic zero for the call. That menas no bonus. After we ask again, we will very politely say goodbye and end the call...that is, unless you have given money to or done work for the organization in the past. THEN they're going to hit you for money. Again, either nicely say no (at which point they will ask you for a smaller gift..then they will end the call if you still say no) or hang up.

If you're eating dinner or busy or on the other line, don't try to be nice and tell them. They will, because they have to, still attempt to "get to the point." If you're busy, just hang up. they are not allowed to be polite and say ok I'll call back. This job is impolite by nature. Do we like doing this? no. I'd much rather tell someone that I'm sorry for bugging them at such a bad time and I'll call back later. I have people to feed though, so I can't.

Finally, if you're going to fuck with a telemarketer (and it's not always all that unwelcome...breaks up an otherwise monotonous and mentally exhausting day) try not to be too mean. And, before you slam the phone down in their headset and dmamge their hearing, tell them you were fucking with them and laugh. They can't laugh unless you do, at least not until you hang up.
 
posted by Aly Oops at 2:00 PM ¤ Permalink ¤


1 Comments:


  • At 6/25/2006 11:17 PM, Blogger jnuts

    I'm so going to talk dirty to you when you call me.

    And I'm feeling you pain about the training. My wife has to have her AHT's (Average Handling Times)down to a certain level or she is threatened with beheading. She's in "counseling" (another way of saying probation) right now because she just can't get with program...meaning that she keeps giving good customer service.

    Good luck. It's a hellacious job doing customer service. It almost makes me want to be nice to "your kind." Hahahahaha.